You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
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