Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
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