At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
