I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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