i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
Randomize
