How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
