real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
Damn victory sex feels great
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