Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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