so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
Fuck appropriateness.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
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