so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
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