they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize
