Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize