did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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