Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
