I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
Randomize