Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
