Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
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