Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
Quick, to the slutcave!
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
