i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
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