She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
i will never coherently bang her
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
Randomize
