The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
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