Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Randomize
