Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Randomize
