YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Randomize
