Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
