cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
Randomize
