on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
Ladies don't puke and tell
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
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