I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Randomize
