Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
Randomize