If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Randomize
