If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
You can't just leave with hair like that
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
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