He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Randomize
