you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
I would ride that face into the sunset
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
