My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
Randomize
