last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Randomize
