I want to stick my p in your. b.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
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