My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Randomize
