ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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