So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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