he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
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