he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Randomize