It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
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