go do what you do best...puke behind churches
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
