3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
Randomize
