Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
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