4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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