I'm jealous of your bromance
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
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