I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
Randomize
