She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize
