apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
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