the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize
