This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize
