how can u be prego again
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
I'm going to write a letter. It's going to say, Dear Every Girl Ever: Take some goddam initiative and wake me up with a blowjob and I will eat out of your hand. Love, Every Guy Ever
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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